It’s no coincident that the biggest heart centred holiday is in February – Valentine’s Day!
If you live in Canada or in particular South Western Ontario, you will know what I mean when I say that February is the most depressing month of the year.
Especially this year. In the last three months we may have had 2 days of sunshine. And we all know that we need sunshine to feel good by supplying us with a much needed vitamin – D.
There are lots of things Vitamin D does in your body, but the biggest thing is to make you feel happy.
More people struggle with depression during January and February, than any other time of the year.
I’m no stranger to depression, I struggled with it numerous times in my life.
I honestly don’t know of a single person, who hasn’t struggled with some form of it in their life.
Which is why I’d like to share with you a large section of my Ultimate Wholistic Healing Joy Kit, to help you discover:
How To Find Your Joy!
[Please bear with me, it is a long blog post, but I feel it is the best way to truly help spread the joy!]
Chronic unhappiness and a lack of joy stem from one main thing;
The suppression and oppression of your unique Soul and Spiritual life.
Not in a WOO WOO mystical way either. What I mean by that, is when you are not living your life based on what you feel is right and true for you; as a unique, amazing individual, you begin to shut down. To “armour” and protect yourself from the hostilities of the world. Putting it that way, you can pretty much imagine that every single individual probably has low grade depression or has gone through some form of it in their earthly lifetime.
Which is true; However, all seemingly negative states have a purpose, just as much as the positives. They are driving forces, that get us up off the couch. They motivate us to make a change; since being in it is not comfortable!
The trick in life is to always remain optimistic.
To choose to look on the bright side of life.
Time and time again, studies have shown that optimistic individuals go further in life and overcome obstacles easier than those who are pessimistic. Seems pretty obvious!
So how do we learn to be optimistic if you are not? How does one actually CHOOSE, every day to think, feel and act in a positive joy filled way, regardless of what life throws at you?
Well, that is a good question.
Personal Story time!
As a teenager I became chronically ill. No one ever really knew what was causing my illness. The point was that I was unhappy, felt horrible, mentally, emotionally and physically. Basically I had a severe case of chronic fatigue, which of course was not known back in the late 70’s. I did eventually begin to crawl out of my dark hole with the help of my mom; whom by the way, is an eternal optimist! I was not though and I can remember constantly being told what a crappy, pessimistic attitude I had. But then again isn’t that a typical teenager???
Well, now that I have my own teens, I would have to say NO, and YES. What is typical is that yes the majority of the teens go through this unhappy, rebellious “screw You” attitude. (we will get to why in a bit!) However, my children who have been raised in a home with stable, mainly healthy on all levels, parents. Whom, communicate, support each other and generally try to do their best to their ability. Are honest and unconditionally loving of their children. But, also teach them the importance of self ownership, helping others when the need arises and they are able to. And to do their own Due Diligence and learn to become self-sufficient young adults as their consciousness and age deems! Whew, this is no easy task, but it develops truly Healthy individual. As healthy as a human can be anyways, since we are always in some process or another. : )
This story is to set you up to understand where and how your original oppression began.
Chronic low grade unhappiness starts right at birth for most people. Maybe your connection to your parents was slim to nil.
If you where never breast fed, like most of the 60, 70’s and 80’s children, then you missed out on one of the most vital connections. Not just the perfect food and immunity building, but the warm loving connection of a fully connected, caring mother.
Of course there are all kinds of excuses and reasons behind this and I could go on for days; however, I just want to be clear that the cold harsh realities of so called NORMAL SOCIETY is not what true resonant healthy society should be. Maybe you did have an awesome loving mother &/or father, and have some semblance of happiness. If so it will be easier to pull yourself into your Joy than if not.
So of course, we all have some degree of oppression, repression and suppression coming from unhappy, either over controlling parents or parents who didn’t give a poop about you. You are on an individual journey in this lifetime to find out who you really are as an individual.
Discover your strengths, your weaknesses,
take the mix and define yourself via your own inner knowing.
To trust, honour and love yourself. Nothing more and nothing less. However, along the way we encounter obstacles, some more than others. Your heart then becomes hardened and armoured as a self protective measure; long before you have any conscious idea of what is going on!
Oppression, repression and suppression
always leads to Depression.
The de-compression or internal repression and drawing away from the external world, happens as the final way to save what is left of your sense of self. Whether we are oppressed outwardly by our parents, guardians, educators, peers etc. Or internally by being incredibly hard on ourselves. Either way the affect is the same. A hardening down of the mental/Soul & emotional/spirit bodies. Thus, an inability to “Get Happy”.
You will probably have very deep seated anger and rage towards this oppression, (which is a good thing) but it is generally buried so deep you can’t even fathom you are angry, but trust me, it’s there!! I know! And it needs to be properly released.
This FREE Information, is to help you realign with who you really are.
It is about helping you to reawaken to the clarity, goodness and power that is really who you are. It is written to assist you in, consciously retiring to the knowledge that you ARE free and that you always HAVE BEEN free, and that you will ALWAYS BE free to make your own choices in life. There is no satisfaction in allowing someone else to attempt to create or to take control of you own life and reality. In fact it is not really possible for anyone else to create your reality but YOU!
Know that you are an amazing individual, whom is loved and loves, because that is what the universe wants. To simply be and feel loved, as you are. With all your uniqueness, seemly good or bad parts, you are you.
How to Choose to be Joy Filled
Lesson 1. Is to simply wake up every day and CHOOSE to feel joy! That’s it. Honestly you could quit here.
How do you CHOOSE to feel joy?
To begin with, until you can simply feel joy every moment unconsciously; you must create the feeling of joy. You do this by finding something in your life that makes you smile. That makes you feel happy. It can be as simple as how good the smell of fresh brewed coffee makes you feel. Or, remembering how good it feels when a loved one whole heartedly hugs you, or the joy you feel watching a pet in it’s silly play.
Whatever you can recall from memory that will bring the feeling of joy to your heart, is how you create it. Then hold that feeling of joy and happiness as you move about your day; as long as possible. Don’t worry if you fall off the happy wagon initially. It happens. Don’t beat yourself up. Once your recognize it, then simply recall the thing that makes you feel happy and start all over again.
Eventually, you won’t have to work so hard to stay happy and joy filled. It will eventually be automatic, every moment of every day. When this happens, life becomes so much more luscious!!
Live the State
Lesson 2. What I mean by this is you must find your inner state of peace, joy and happiness.
If your life was everything you ever wanted it to be. If you had all the money you desired, the freedom to do as you liked, all the love and friendship you ever needed, what state would that be for you?
Find a single word that best describes that state for you and write it down!
Mine is RELIEF. When I think of living my perfect life I feel complete and utter relief which brings me a state of peace, joy and happiness.
Now that you have your word use it to create that FEELING in your life, as much and as often as you can. Your FEELINGS, create your energy and actions in life that will bring to you exactly the same state you desire.
Like Attracts like
What I do is each morning before I get out of bed and each evening just after getting into bed, I think my word of relief. I ruminate on how relieved I am to be living my ideal life. That life brings to me always what I focus on and desire most.
If negative thoughts or worries come up, I simply brush them aside. I can’t do anything about them right then, and what you focus on is what persists in your life, so focus on your state of joy, peace and happiness most of the time; and this is what will bring to you, most of the time!!
If you struggle to FEEL any state of peace, joy or happiness then;
Take one or two old memories that made you feel amazing, loved, joyful, happy, and put them in down on paper. Preferably bright, colourful paper, and carry them with you. Every time you feel down, stressed, sad or unhappy, take them out, read them, then allow yourself a couple of minutes to well up the emotion of joy and happiness that goes along with them.
What you are doing is rewiring your Self to remember that you can feel joy and happiness. That this is by far a better place to be most of the time than the other place! Plus you are teaching yourself to be optimistic, to look on the bright side of life more often. Because in reality, your reality and what you believe about life is your CHOICE!
Feel the Sunshine!
Lesson 3. I would like you to get at least 20 minutes a day of either real or fake/real sunshine! wrap yourself up in it for those 20 minutes and stop thinking of anything but the warmth and how good it feels in your heart and soul! Remind yourself that you are doing this because you love yourself just the way you are.
Not only are you getting the highest and best form of Vitamin D, you are also infusing yourself with strong life energy.
Now that you have some warmth in your life force, soul & spirit, lets get motivated.
Get the Energy Moving
Another great way to begin to feel optimistic is to begin to move your body, feel its strengths and ability to move in rhythm. Movement, when done in harmony with your own individualism, stimulates not only endorphins (the feel good hormone) but the lymphatic system. Allowing your body to flush out toxins at a cellular level.
Lesson 4. Move! In what ever way you feel inspired to, but get up and out and move. Find some great music that inspires you and makes you want to move. Make a play list on what ever music device you own, or borrow your kids! They love that. : )- Now simply begin walking around the block, lane way, local park, what ever tickles your fancy. But get outside and move. Breath in the fresh air, fill your lungs with new life, new oxygen and feel it energize your body. Go at your own pace.
I would like you to work up to lots of different types of movement. Find a sport you like, join a club, dance class etc. These are all potential goals, so write a list of potential movement joy inspiring physical activity you may like to eventually do and post it on your fridge to see every day. This is your motivation to simply begin today by walking.
For more specific Orgonotic body energizing exercises you can go to page 33 of my JOY kit To Extra Remedial Support!
Breathe work; Getting proper oxygen into your lungs will ensure that you are enlivening your whole body with life energy. When we are depressed or stressed we often shallow breathe. Meaning you only take short tight breathes and never fully release or get it deep enough into your body. Taking slow deep breathes through your nose, ensures you are not stressing out your bronchial and airways. Thus, creating a calmer breathing pattern. Give it a try on your nature, love walk!
You will notice that I never mention any negatives, like how your body might be aching when you move etc. That is because I don’t want you to focus on any negatives. The only way to build optimism is if you gently honour that yep, you have some seemingly negative issues, who doesn’t, your human for goodness sake! However, every time you catch yourself thinking and focusing on any unhappy aspects of yourself, I want you to gently let yourself know it is ok to be human.
Then let go of that thought and begin to focus on some aspect of yourself that you do like. And if you can’t think of something you do like about yourself right now, I want you to think of an aspect you would like to be!
Maybe you’d like to simply feel happier, well, what does make you feel happy. Think of a time or event that made you smile and laugh.
I know I have lots of those events, especially with having children and lots of animals! So find a joyful memory and wrap yourself up in its memory, allow yourself to feel it again. Once you can FEEL its joy, hold on to that feeling as long as you can. This is going to be your starting point. The more you can hang on to and redevelop this feeling. The more often you will simply naturally be in this state and not in it’s counter feeling of unhappiness.
Now hopefully once you get yourself feeling warm and tingly with life energy, you will have some Self inspired motivation to do some bigger mental and emotional work.
Lesson 5. After you have done your sun, and your walk/exercise, I would like you to sit down and write a list of all of your accomplishments in this lifetime. They can be as simple as surviving life to this point!
Cuz, heck sometimes we feel like that, and it’s okay!
I would like you to come up with as many as you can. Eventually as you begin to rewire joy back in to your life, you will add to the list. Often we overlook events or simple things like, “hey I did eventually learn how to ride a bike!!” (I was probably 12 when I finally had the courage to try and ride a 2 wheel bike!! seriously, I could not figure it out for the life of me : ) ) But I eventually did it so hey – Yaa me!!
What Yaa, you’s can you think of? Make a list and look at it every day and try to add a new one each day.
I’m sure at this point you are thinking, nope, this isn’t going to work! I can’t see how any of this is really going to pull me out of this unhappy place. I want you to trust me here. I have been where you are right now and the only way through it is to make a choice. Make a Self Inspired Choice! You are worth it, even if you don’t think so at this time.
Depression or chronic unhappiness is a personal state of mind that you have maybe unwittingly accepted in to your life. Life has been tough, maybe not fair, maybe you beat yourself up over things that are long done or that you never did!? But like Joy, unhappiness is a choice, you just don’t realize you decided to buy into it.
It is time to change it!
One step at a time you can change yourself, it is possible, you just have to have the courage and the will to do it!
Let’s look at this state of mind
Depression or chronic lack of joy is a pretty broad term. In general in ranges from feeling “down” and a general loss of motivation to so-called endogenous depression with its characteristic total apathy (lack of life force). Along with this shutting down of oneself emotionally and mentally there is a plethora of physical symptoms. Such as; tiredness, sleep disorders, loss of appetite, constipation, headaches, heart palpitations, lumbago, disturbed periods in women and loss of body tone.
You may also be plagued with strong feelings of guilt and self reproach and constantly worry about making amends. As I had said earlier, depression is a comp-pression of the individual life force. What are you compressing or repressing internally that is causing you so much pain? This needs to be looked at if you are to be able to let go and resolve.
Lesson 6. Make a list of all the things you think about, dwell on and bemoan while in this state. What repetitive pattern of thought are you playing over and over, like a broken record in your head?
Make this list down one side of a piece of paper. Once you have a list of thought negative, self destructive patterns, make a list beside them of their complete counter opposite. Like this:
I am stupid I am intelligent
I don’t deserve to live I deserve to live
I hate myself I Love myself
What you are going to do is begin each day by looking at the positive side of the list and read it. However as you read it I want you to imagine what those concepts would feel like, if you believed them. How would you feel about yourself if you believed you where intelligent and loved? The feeling is the important part. Again we are creating a new pattern within your soul. One where you can be the person you want to be with all the positive beliefs.
Do not be hard on yourself, this is not an easy exercise and it takes time, trust me it takes time!! But love yourself enough to take the time everyday to do this. Even if you don’t “think” you are feeling or believing the words, it is simply important to keep trying.
Perseverance and patience are kind, karmic traits!
Take your time to practice these steps. Let the flow happen, find the energy of universal source that is pure love. Trust that you deserve everything you desire; Joy, Health and Wealth.
If you progress through these steps and simply cannot get to the sweet spot in life; there may be some big mental and emotional guns behind your lack of joy, that you simply are unable to release on your own.
It’s okay, I’m here to help you break free from any unwanted boundaries.
email me at – email@example.com and let’s chat.
in whole health, let me know your thoughts, your struggles and ways that I can help support you.
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